Monday, January 23, 2012


After 3 days at daycare Little G got sick. She was acting up, crying and wanting to be held.. nothing like her usual self. She was running a low-grade fever. By the next morning it was a full blown fever with runny nose so I kept her home from daycare. She was still eating/drinking OK - I just gave her baby tyl.enol every few hours. She seemed ok on the following morning so I sent her to daycare, at about 1pm I got a call saying that her fever was 102 so I went and got her. Poor kid! On Saturday when the fever still hadn't broken we brought her to the walking clinic. Turns out she had an ear infection, inflamed tonsils and a stomach bug. We were given antibiotics and sent on our way.

Saturday night was not a good one, the fever was just not breaking -it got up to around 104/105 and scared the hell out of me. I would give her a sponge bath and that would momentarily lower the fever and then it would shoot right back up again. It finally broke sometime on Saturday night. The antibiotics seem to be working and my little girl is almost all the way back to her former self.

Of course, both H and I have her cold now. Poor H is in Van.couver on business and is feeling awful.

I'm glad that I had her start back at daycare while I am still off work. I can't imagine what it would have been like if I was just started back to work and she got sick like that.

I hope this isn't a sign of things to come for Little G. She only had 1 cold in her first 12 months. And has already had one in her first week of daycare. Argh!

Monday, January 16, 2012

First Day of Daycare

Little G had her first day of daycare today. We took a picture to mark the occasion, I'll try to upload it here later. Her Dad and I dropped her off. She cried at first, H and I stayed for about an hour or so, then I cried in the car. Even though I had a minor cry, it really wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. She was only there for a few hours so it was pretty easy to get through. Tomorrow she goes full time and I imagine that will be a lot worse! I am off for the next two weeks, so I will be tying up loose ends etc and will be available in case anything goes wrong at daycare.

Then it's back to work. I am SO not looking forward to that.

On another note, my cycle was 19 days this month so it's pretty obvious my fertility is basically falling off a cliff. We aren't even 100% sure that we want another baby, but to know that even my 1% chance is disappearing is so depressing and frustrating. Having a baby gives you distance from infertility (and definitely makes having gone through the shit worth it), but it doesn't erase it. I feel like an asshole complaining about this stuff when there are women fighting to have a baby. But, it is hard to get rid of this "why can't my body just do what it's supposed to do" feeling.

Tuesday, January 03, 2012

Happy New Year!

My cycle is messed up and it's driving me crazy. I got my period on CD20. It was really light - like only there when I wiped or some occasional spotting for 5 days. On the 5th day it was mixed with eggwhite CM and today (CD6) there was more eggwhite CM. So apparently, my body thinks it is ovulating... on CD6! I bought an HPT and took it because of how weird I have been feeling. Of course it was negative. That's right because I don't get pg on my own!

We want to start TTCing again and see what happens because you never know what could happen. There is a teeny tiny chance it could happen. Then we'll probably go back to the Czech Republic in the summer of 2013 and do a FET.

Regardless of what/when/how we try to get pg it would be great if I could have normal cycles. Not ones that are all over the place. Freaking period on CD20!

On top of this, I am already getting over-whelmed by this year. We are moving - hopefully before the end of April. I am looking for a new job. We have 3 weddings this year. One in Canada's capital, one at an ivy league school in the States, and one just north of the city. I am a bridesmaid in that one and Little G is the flower girl (hopefully she's walking by July). I know it doesn't all happen at once, but it seems like a lot.

I just need to breath and take one day at a time.