Tuesday, October 21, 2008

A Vent

I have a beef to pick with the message board world. I am getting tired of seeing people say “I can’t believe this is happening to you. You deserve to get pregnant.” As in, a particular person deserves to be pregnant more than other people. I really hate it when that is said for two reasons. The first being that for the most part, we are all deserving of the ability to get and stay pregnant. We are all deserving of having a child to raise, care for and love. Everyone has their own personal struggles that they need to overcome and no one is in the position of judging which person is more “deserving”. The second reason that I hate seeing this is because it doesn’t do anything to make it better. Let’s say I do think that I am more deserving that I deserve to get pregnant after 25 failed cycles more than a woman trying for the first time. When I’m proven not pregnant yet again, how can being told I’m more deserving help with the situation? It seems to me that if I truly believe that I ‘deserve’ to be pregnant, then not being pregnant will be even more difficult. So ladies, I thank-you for your thoughts and know your hearts are in the right place, but a simple “I’m sorry” will suffice.

Ahhh, I feel a little better now.


Portia P said...

Thanks for your visit to my blog.

You're right. No one deserves or doesn't deserve to be pg. No one deserves the sh** that many of us have gone through.

I suppose people are just trying to say something nice....

Hope your cold feels better soon.

Andrea said...

Great point! I will remember it on the message boards I frequent!

Lost in Space said...

Uggghh. I always try to tell myself that I know they mean well, but some days it just gets the best of me.

I'm totally on board with the universal "I'm sorry." Sometimes that is all we want to hear. Huge hugs.

Echloe said...

I agree with you. I think people just run out of stuff to say.