Monday, April 20, 2009

A Beautiful Offer

On Friday night, when I got home from work I had received a message on from my cousin. She was emailing to say that she had heard about the IVF not working and offering her support. She said that she loved me and wanted to do whatever she could to help me and wanted to offer to donate her eggs so that H. and I could have a child. I was literally struck speechless and immediately started crying. What a truly loving and selfless gift. I am so incredibly blessed to have her in my life.

H. and I don’t know what we want to do if we ever get to the point of not using my eggs. We’ve talked and we don’t really want to use DE or adopt. Who knows what we’d do if we reach that fork in the road.

I basically told her that we’re not going that route, but that I was so incredibly touched, and humbled, that she would make the offer.

The more I think about it the weirder it seems to me. Essentially, my child would really be half my cousin’s and half my husband’s. The child would be raised in the family knowing that I would be its mother, but that its bio-mom was my cousin.

I don’t know if I am open minded enough for that.

This just reminds me that there is a benefit to this struggle that H and I are slugging out - we are continually reminded of how much we’re loved and cared for. I have been able to see compassion and caring from virtual strangers; to see the community that has been built around infertility and the strength that women have. I have had my faith in people continually restored. In this form, infertility has been gift.

1 comment:

Lost in Space said...

Wow, truly a beautiful gift to be offered!