Thursday, February 11, 2010

Hmph, another one.

I'm not sure how to feel about this... was at my naturopath's office today getting my weekly acupuncture treatment (fell asleep on the table today) and began talking ot her about my favourite cousin that's pregnant and how for the first time in a long time I felt excitement and hope for the future. We talked a bit about it for a while and then she said, "Well, I better tell you this now before you are able to notice it..." And of course I'm standing there with this dumb smile on my face trying to reason out what is going to come next. "I'm pregnant". Of course I was excited and said all of the right things.

And, in the moment, there wasn't even a small part of me that was sad. I think I was in shock. She is 16 weeks along.

I am extremely happy for her and I love going to her, but there's this small part of me that thinks I won't be able to continue to see her. She now embodies what I want.

Is it weird that I'm not sure about continuing to see her?


Kate said...

Totally natural. Though if you love the work she does and don't have another acupuncturist who you trust, I'd probably suck it up and keep going. Hopefully by the time she's big, you'll be pregnant with your own baby(ies).

Mad Hatter said...

As soon as she announced she's pregnant, I felt a punch in the stomach. It's good that you're not sad or anything, but at the same time considering not returning to her is not weird at all. I stopped seeing my colourist once she became pregnant. I just didn't want to be around her, didn't want to talk about it, just didn't didn't didn't. It felt like a tease. And it's not like she's my good friend or anything. If you do decide to defect, you know how much I love Yu Ming...I may have already sent you her contact info, but if not, you know where to find me!

Fran said...

Nothing wrong with that pet, it may be that when you come back from Brno with your very own positive pregnancy test, you'll be very happy to go to her again! Fran

Valery said...

how you feel is how you feel, and that's OK! And how you feel tomorrow may be different.
I loved going to my pregnant hairdresser, I'm the kind of person who hopes it will "rub off on me"
(while noting slightly maliciously that her face was getting puffy)

Anonymous said...

nothing wrong with those feelings at all. it could happen with any you see regularly. see how it goes and check around to see who else is out there. who knows she might be your lucky charm.

Lost in Space said...

It's where you go to relax and get your body-mind in focus. If stressing about seeing her pregnant is going to defeat that purpose, then find someone else and don't give it any more thought.

I'm sorry you are getting bombarded with announcements. I was catching up on your last few posts and saw your cousin's news too. Big hugs, Sweet G. It can be a lot to take no matter how excited you feel about your approaching DE cycle.

Oh, and haven't seen the show you are talking about in your last post, but know that feeling when watching an unrealistic show. No wonder the media and people who have never "been there" have such screwed up ideas of what it is like...