Wednesday, October 14, 2009

No IVF for Me

So, a few people asked why my RE won't do IVF with me even though my numbers are so good. It's because I don't respond to meds. I was on 300 ius of Puregon for my IVF and I got 3 follicles and 1 egg. One of the follicles looked to be a cyst. During an EPP (which I don't feel was really EPP) monitored cycle I was on 300ius of Puregon again and there were 6 follies in play, but only one grew to maturity. This was with two different REs and neither would boost the meds higher. Which frustrated me to no end.

I know that being overweight can impede your response to meds as well. I am significantly overweight. So here's my plan. I'm going to lose weight and then I am going to demand one last IVF with my eggs.

You see, I told H. that my dream, if money was not an object, is to do the following.

Give myself 3 months of dedicated working out and eating right. I should be able to lose around 20 to 25lbs in that time conservatively. Then force Dr H2.0 to do a full on IVF cycle with me. I've never done an antogonist cycle or a full EPP. For my IVF we just started meds and away we went. And, I want him to be aggressive - at least 450ius starting on Day 2. I want him to give me a final chance with my eggs, pulling out all of the stops. Then if that didn't work we'd go to donor eggs. That's my perfect world scenario. (well, we all know my capital P Perfect world would be a natural pregnancy that goes full term and ends with a healthy baby).

We can't afford to do both a final IVF with my own eggs and also donor eggs. So, we have a decision to make. If I'm really being honest with myself, we can't even afford either of those options. But we can't afford not to as well.

So, that's my story on why we can't do IVF as per my RE.

Oh, here's the thing. I lack motivation. I know what I want to do, need to do, but I can't get my ass in gear. Please help! Give me ideas on how to get out of this funk and start taking care of myself.

9 comments:

Spacey said...

((hugs)) Those are some tough decisions to make. I have no advice, but I wanted to give you some big hugs. I hope you'll find the motivation you need to move ahead with your plan.

Mad Hatter said...

Okay, please forgive me for not knowing the answers to these questions, but you have high FSH like me, and as you know, I can't do IVF right now, either, but am doing the acupuncture/DHEA/naturopathy/IUI route and I'm just not clear on why this isn't a possible path for you...I have copies of amazing stats on recent studies on what DHEA is doing to help women in our age ranges...As always, if you're interested in knowing more, e-mail me and I can get you copies, as well as refer you to my fertility naturopath and acupuncturist, and even my RE, if you like, since we are so close geographically! I think there is a lot of hope for you yet, WITHOUT IVF, especially with your DH's stellar sperm!
Love,
Maddy

Momasita said...

Maddy - Thanks! Where do you get your DHEA? I've ordered it from the states before. We can do the natural IUI thing... I just ovulated too early to do that last month. Thanks for the feedback. I know there's hope, it's just hard to focus on sometimes.

Spacey - Thanks!!

Phoebe said...

This is a really really tough place to be in, and you know I was/am dealing with the same thing. I know everyone thinks 38 is old, but it's not. You are a spring chicken compared to me at 43. I got pg at 41. You do have to be motivated - very very motivated - to change everything and get super healthy. Have you thought about hypnotherapy to lose the weight and to improve your fertility? There have been a couple of gals on my blogroll who have done this, most recently Jill from "Redefining the Birds and Bees". Jill just found out she is pg after 3 failed IVFs. Also, kayjay from "A Mircle to Come" did it and is pg with twins after a very long fight with IF. I just did it myself on Monday, and have yet to post on it.

Before you do the DHEA, get your thyroid levels, DHEA, and testosterone levels checked. Also, make sure you rule out PCOS. I'm on the high range of testosterone, but I am not PCOS. Leave no stone unturned. Also, get a copy of "The Infertility Cure" if you haven't already got one yet. For me, I can not take much DHEA or for very long because my Chinese medical diagnosis is the exact opposite of Maddy's. Everyone is different, so make sure you know your body and what it needs before you start randomly taking things. Please, work with a qualitifed health care practitioner/acupuncturist!

I like your plan for the IVF too. I did 600iu of stims when I was on the max (combo of Menopur and Follistim). I was also on human growth hormone.

I would say that if you are not getting pg on your own, and IUI has not worked yet, don't waste your time, money, and eggs on it. Just get your body ready for IVF and go for it. This takes a lot of disciple, because you are going to have to give yourself 3-6 months to do this. Three months is really a minimum. Six months may be more realistic for you. I know that at our age, you feel like you don't have 6 months, but you really do. If you have any doubts, read "Inconceivable" by Julia Indochovia. It's her story about how she got pg with high FSH on her own at 42 when all the fertility clinics turned her down. She also put out another book that is pretty good, called "The Fertile Soul".

Mad Hatter said...

Sweet G: in Canada, you need a prescription for DHEA and really, I think that's a good idea for all the reasons Phoebe mentioned - you want your levels and dose to be supervised. My doctor prescribed it to me and my pre-DHEA testosterone levels were below the normal range, and I feel awesome on it - as Phoebe says, everyone has different needs and it might not be the magic answer for all, bit definitely worth exploring. I will send you an e-mail with all my contacts so you have them should you choose to use them.

Fran said...

Oh tell me about motivation...I've been a couch potato for a while now and i'm actually afraid of stepping on the scale...But now that my HCG is back to normal I can restart the detox and shifting a bit of "softness" around the hips!

Meanwhile I've left you an award on my blog (as soon as I post the next post!)

Unknown said...

good luck with your weight loss & IVF. I'm in a similar spot - not easy :(

Lost in Space said...

From my limited knowledge, it sounds like you could respond to meds with a higher dose and with the right protocol that doesn't leave you with a lead follicle. I would be really frustrated with them not willing to boost your meds any higher. At 34 and 35 I was on 300 gonal-f and 150 menopur.

As for the motivation to get yourself healthy, that is tough. Keeping your eye on the prize is the best I can come up with. Would it help to tell yourself that it doesn't have to be forever? Sometimes knowing there is an "end" goal can help - sometimes it's a class reunion or wedding or whatever... This time it is for IVF and a shot at having a baby!!

Anonymous said...

Those are huge choices. I'm with you, I'm trying to get some weight off myself before we try IVF. I want to give us the best possible chance for a BFP.

Also, maybe you should check out a second opinion?