Tuesday, June 02, 2009

I Feel Like an Asshat

Remember me talking about the cousin that got pregnant. She had a miscarriage. I feel like an asshat for being even an iota envious of her for being able to do what my body hasn't done as of yet. I know I never wished her illwill, nor did I want her to lose the baby. I hate to even write this, but I just had a feeling that she was going to miscarry. I was even checking the board dealing with that topic to see if she had posted.

I do get 'feelings' every once in a while and I'm usually pretty spot on. I hate that my feeling was right in this case.

2 comments:

Sandra D. said...

I don't think you should worry about it at all. We have all had those feelings - and not just about infertility! I remember when all my friends were getting married in our 20s, I was so jealous. That's just human nature :-)

And you're welcome about the Sisterhood Award. You deserve it!

Fran said...

when this thing happens and you had a "feeling" it was going to, it's as if you think you put a spell on the person. But obviously this is not the case. I was talking to a psycologist once about this (it happens to me too!!) and she said that some people are subconsciously more aware and so you might have picked up something even just from talking to her that alerted you with a "bad feeling". hope you don't mind me sharing this with you! And remember that what you felt about the pregnancy news is just the reality for all of us IF friends. Love, Fran