Saturday, June 20, 2009

Lovely Dream

Last night I had a dream that I gave birth to a baby girl. It was amazing and as dreams go, pretty weird. We were at our house, that wasn't our house, having a party of sorts. My parents were there, my brother and my husband as well as several close friends. When I went into labour all of the friends were in the back room while we were in the front. We being H., my parents, my brother and I. Then it zoomed in on my and my Mom was right there. I gave birth on the living room floor. I reached down between my legs as I delivered the baby. And, there was no pain, no lead up. I just pushed a couple times and out she came. We didn't have any towels or anything and I wrapped her in my housecoat. She had the chubbiest cheeks and looked like one of my cousin's daughters.

It was incredible. I was so happy. We were so happy.

I want that.

Thank-you for all of your comments to yesterday's news. I'm not sure where we go from here, but I haven't given up hope. Maybe I'm stupid or maybe just plain stubborn. But, until the fat lady sings, I'm not giving up. Now, that may mean donor eggs (I feel like there's a whole lot of weirdness that goes with that particularly if it's a known donor) or it could mean adoption. Whatever it means, I want a child, I want to be a mother.

5 comments:

Fran said...

Your dream brought a tear to my eye! So sweet! I have the feeling it's a good sign. It has to be. love, Fran

G & H said...

And a mother you will be! There are so many ways and we are starting to see our dream thru adoption! Where there is a will there is a way and no doubt you have the hearts strongest desire!

Will be keeping you in thought and prayer!

Spacey said...

And you will be a mother! :)

iamstacey said...

I just love your dream. I hope it come true for us both!

Fran said...

Sweetie, thank you for your post on my blog, really appreciated it! lots of love, Fran