Thursday, January 28, 2010

Feeling Better

After my post the other day, I was worried that I would have alienated all of you. Thank-you for all of your comments, they mean a lot to me.

I think I need to let everything hang out - warts and all - every once in a while. It is freeing. Unfortunately, my time has been spent ignoring how I'm feeling. H. called me out last night - he said that when I get home I bury my head in a book or watching tv or in my knitting - that I'm not doing anything. I have a course I'm supposed to be completing and I have a goal to lose weight before our trip, but I'm just a lump. He's right, but it's not intentional, it's because I feel frozen and over-whelmed. But, I just have to DO something and the rest will come. So, that's what I'm going to do. Just DO something - like read a chapter of my course, and take the puppies for walks.

Oh ya, my title says I'm feeling better. I am. After my appointment with my GP I had already felt like the world had lifted a little from my shoulders. Then, I wrote that post and let me demons hang out for all to see. That was very freeing and also dimished the power of my negative, anxious thoughts. Today, I saw my amazingly awesome Naturopath. I heart her! Our appointments start the same way, she asks me how I am, and I blab (told her all about the stuff that had been making me batty), then she asks me to lie down on the table and she puts in my needles. Today's points were in both shins, outside of both wrists, between the eyes, 3 in my belly, and one in the top of my head. At this point, she usually leaves me alone, but not today. Today she just sat with me and asked me questions about how I'm doing etc. She told me about other patients that have gone through donor egg and how they felt. Then the needles in my wrists were hurting in a sharp not so good way so she took them out. We talked a little more and then the session was over. She took all of the needles out and the one in my head and the one between my eyes bled. The one between my eyes was particularly bad and was throbbing. This is a major stress point which just confirmed everything that I had told her. Before I left she recommended I take Valericalm by St. Francis. She said that it is not an anti-depressant, but it just takes the edge off things. I'm willing to give it a shot.

The acupuncture worked wonders for me. I have been feeling like there's someone sitting on my chest and now I don't have that feeling at all. The pressure has lifted. I don't know if you have tried acupuncture, but I am a true believer!


one thing on my mind said...

I have only just started reading your blog, so I hope you don't mind me commenting. I just wanted to say something about acupuncture. I have been having acupuncture now for around 6-7 months (both in Sydney, and now in NYC where I live), and I truly believe it is one of the best things I ever did. I too am a believer! Not only do I believe in the efficacy of the treatment (I have some weird stories about pains and lumps disappearing, unrelated to TTC), but I think it is a special time for yourself each week. It allows you to lie still and think of nothing but your own body. The points your acupuncturist is using sound very similar to the ones mine uses. I also find mine a great listener. I nearly cried in her room a few weeks ago. For some reason I feel I can really open up to her.
I consider myself a convert. And I like that it is complementary to western medicine, which of course we could never give up on.
Stay strong. x

Mad Hatter said...

I am very happy to hear you are feeling a little better and that you are taking action by seeing your acupuncturist and figuring out what will work with your course and puppy-walking...The journey you have been on has been filled with so many ups and downs and so much that is beyond your control - as it is for all of us with IF...You may not always feel like it, but I think you and your husband have been coping very well under the circumstances - you clearly have a strong relationship. ((Hugs))

Lost in Space said...

Glad you are feeling better and finding ways to help yourself cope. I'll bet those pups will enjoy their walk time with you!

So glad you like the acupuncture. I was lukewarm with it...I enjoyed the time to relax on the table and just collect my thoughts, but was iffy with the needles. Some weeks I seemed to feel better and others were just "eh". (-;